I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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