Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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