Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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