He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
