i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
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During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
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Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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