I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
