awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
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I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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