All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I am one with the molecules
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
