Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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