The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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