I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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