wat bout pragnant strippers??
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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