I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
