Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
