First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize