I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I will be naked everywhere
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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