Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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