yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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