i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
im about as happy as oj after his trial
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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