just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
it hurts more in the daytime
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
