im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
operation harelip BJ is a go
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
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Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
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I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing