Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
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He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
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I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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