i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize