THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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