ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
