Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize