It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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