you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
