After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
