I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I would fuck him just for his dog
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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