You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
