You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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