Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
