i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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