we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
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