How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
