I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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