My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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