I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
