the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize