Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Two words: nipple clamps
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