Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
