people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize