i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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