I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
