I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
