Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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