sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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