Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.

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  (303): So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl. http://tfl.nu/7x7a
  Replies (4) Good night (1264) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude that chick in the corner just threw up

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Hot

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  (215): Dude that chick in the corner just threw up (201): Hot http://tfl.nu/kiil
  Replies (2) Good night (895) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm

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  (386): Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm http://tfl.nu/fmji
  Replies (12) Good night (780) Bad night (4342)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever

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  (850): By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever http://tfl.nu/n0rq
  Replies (56) Good night (12674) Bad night (1215)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.

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  (602): When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself. http://tfl.nu/8ts9
  Replies (72) Good night (2426) Bad night (14693)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?

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  (859): he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in? http://tfl.nu/0531
  Replies (52) Good night (1293) Bad night (6942)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.

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  (973): Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick. http://tfl.nu/r63g
  Replies (7) Good night (1005) Bad night (3828)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.

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  (913): his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up. http://tfl.nu/i0an
  Replies (21) Good night (1168) Bad night (8138)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?

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  (585): i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair? http://tfl.nu/daid
  Replies (32) Good night (10985) Bad night (1288)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.

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  (313): I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many. http://tfl.nu/e16i
  Replies (6) Good night (2374) Bad night (1426)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.

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  (847): I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet. http://tfl.nu/ancz
  Replies (10) Good night (4163) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.

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  (320): Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later. http://tfl.nu/4ix3
  Replies (8) Good night (1412) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.

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  (785): All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood. http://tfl.nu/5nl6
  Replies (4) Good night (504) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  THAT'S MY GIRL

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  (919): So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy. (336): THAT'S MY GIRL http://tfl.nu/glim
  Replies (1) Good night (1123) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale

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  (515): as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale http://tfl.nu/139w
  Replies (4) Good night (406) Bad night (137)

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