She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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