She's JV to your varsity
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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